How exciting, you’re ready to embark on the next stage of your relationship and decided now is the time to move in together. If you’ve decided to rent or buy your first home, we bet you can’t wait to have a space that is just yours. When it comes to relationships, I don’t think any couple would say lockdown hasn’t come without challenges, yet if you are still living in separate abodes moving in together could be your biggest challenge to date if you haven’t talked everything through first. From financials to daily chores, from what belongings you will be bringing to communicating, there are many things to consider. We want moving into your first ‘together’ home to be a wonderful experience, so we have put together some top tips of things to consider to make sure moving in with your partner is a success.
Be open about your finances
Let’s start with probably one of the most difficult tasks you may have, and that’s an honest conversation about your personal finances. When you move in together you will have some joint financial responsibilities, such as your rent or mortgage, bills, shopping even the Sky TV subscription and broadband. It’s important to discuss and put plans in place for things to be paid, whether you decide to open a joint account for ‘home’ expenses or split payments, you will find that getting this organised before you move in will ease some of your worries.
No one wants to start off an exciting new chapter with stresses over money when you should be enjoying having a place of your own. If you haven’t already done so, get a list together of all your expected expenses and then ask someone to check you haven’t missed anything. This way, your new life together will be starting with a clear understanding of your financial commitments and how they are going to be met.
You may both may be very handy around a home and have no issues doing the washing up and mowing the lawn, but what are your expectations? One thing about jobs around the house is that they can easily become niggles that blow up into issues if you’re always the one doing the majority of the housework whilst juggling work and life.
We all have our own ways of living; you may be a neat freak and your partner could suffer from dropsie, which could cause tensions. This is why a simple conversation about who is going to do what can help iron out any teething problems. Bear in mind, you will also have your own way of doing things – you may fold the towels one way, your partner another. There are just some things you’ll have to agree to disagree on and learn the art of compromise.
When two become one, there are two lots of ‘stuff’ that need to work in harmony within a home, so you need to talk about your belongings. Having too many things in a new home can be stressful, especially if you don’t have space for everything and your home becomes cluttered and disorganised. If you’ve been both living alone you could have a lot of doubles – you don’t need two kettles, 18 mugs (well, you might!) two sofas… You get the idea.
Make an inventory of what you each have and then bring your lists together so you can work out what’s important to you both. Decide which belongings to downsize, what stays, and what will be sold or donated before you move in – you may even make a little money to buy something new.
Just enjoy it
Talking through any issues is going to be a wonderful foundation for any relationship, even more so when you’re taking this amazing and exciting step of moving in together. Take a breath – moving home is stressful, there are bound to be some silly arguments over nothing, but don’t let that mar this important new adventure. Just relax and focus on your life together; after the year we’ve had, you deserve so much happiness.
So on the first night, as you sit down in your new home, take a moment and smile, because this is now your ‘together’ home and that should be celebrated!